the lost gift

just about a week ago
i was writing of this gift
i found
now sitting here wondering
why you're so low down
cant get passed
the sudden decision
that you made
would have never predicted this
you said you loved me
but you didn't show it
you sang love songs
while we made love
i cant imagine
what goes on in your head
i should have never
allowed you into my bed
you say that time
doesn't keep us apart
but i don't understand
what is in your heart
its seems as though
when you feel love
you run
acting that way
will only lead you astray
my heart breaks
a little more each day
you said you'd be here
and you'd never go away
i was completely full
and here i am
as empty as can be
you said one thing
but continue to do another
words can not express
this slow disintegration
of my heart
i havent been heart broken
in some time now
i dont like the feeling
and this has to be the worst
because you leave without
notice
you just cut all communication
i wont begin to tell you
the things i've contemplated
because you would never
believe me
you are a selfish man
a pitiful man
a dam shame
a waste
i cant believe
this is the man i love
yes still
LOVE
stupid me
I know

trying haiku

Raindrops on a leaf
they roll down ever so slow
wanting to feel love

I get it

I wish you were different
but I can not change you
I wish more for us
but I can not make you
this wont be long
and I wont draw it out
I get it
I only wish you would have
called and told me
I have no ill feeling
just a little confused
it was fun at times
I pray you find
someone willing to accept
the way you choose to love
i obviously...
cant handle it!

this gift...

like two wolves in the desert
howling at the moon
we are drawn by something
so much bigger than us
not negotiated or rehearsed
this is instinct
so natural and unexplainable

there was no preparation
no studying for this test
not easier said than done
this here is a piece of cake
emotional fulfillment
and an explosive attraction
science like
could cause a nuclear reaction

other's stare
attempting to hate
there is no separating this pair
this union is strong
no lying or snitching
no cheating, no bitching
we only cry happy tears
over here
been doing this love thing for years

i am his equal
but he is my king
i walk beside him
but he treats me like his queen
his chocolate complexion
against my caramel tone
his luscious lips
pressed up against mine
cant stay away for too long
he is the sun
that brightens my day
he will always be a part of me
for our entire eternity

i give thanks everyday
for this joy i've found
i pray and ask HIM
to keep you with me always.